Beyond Reason/s

 How do you know you loved me? you asked.

 

I loved you outside my normal ways of being

I loved you beyond comfort, ease or predictability.

I wanted to feed your belly and soothe your spirit.

I loved you in crisis and amidst uncertainty.

 

I was willing to be hurt, heartbroken or wrong.

You were the constellation I was longing to see,

the poem I memorized in another life.

a song I hummed unconsciously –

a familiar mystery.

 

I was never one hundred percent certain,

did not know how the story would end,

how we would  handle disappointments

which all were to come.

 

Only that I was willing to be crushed, betrayed, abandoned and forsaken

to see you sip your coffee, to watch your eyes light up a dark sky and

admire you on a stage as your energy beamed.

 

You were  the prince kissing this common girl.

I was Snow White waking up,

Cinderella slipping in a slipper,

the fearless adventurer I was meant to be but never was.

 

Triumphant, brought back to life, there was no way to lose.

I was in love with loving you.

Even if the lights had not dimmed,

one of us would have died first.

There is no great love without loss.

It was worth the cost.

 

I gravitated towards your center

but held my own.

To be in your heart

I walked the moon

of my own distance.

Alone I am now and

still grateful.

 

The sun has my back

even as she casts

her shadows.

 

“How do you know you love me?” you asked.

I didn’t. I just did.

I loved you wordlessly,

beyond reason.